Kids mostly make us laugh with their view of the world and their silliness with the things they say. Sometimes, though, what they have to say can be downright disturbing.
"There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child," according to author Walt Streightiff. "There are seven million." Seems pretty true, and some argue that kids are even perceptive to other dimensions and the spirit world. If you don't believe that, how can you explain anecdotes of kids perfectly describing dead relatives they've never met?
Maybe you just think kids say the darndest things and we can leave it at that. Well, the folks of reddit might disagree. The stories they shared show kids to be a little creepy when they're being brutally honest. That honesty can come off as dark, as you'll see, but without a filter, honesty can be that way.
Although these quotes can be chilling and dark, they will still make you laugh because they come from innocence, and that's refreshing.
waisbrenmd.com
Don't forget to check the comment section below the article for more interesting stories!
#25 Dinner Time, Kids!
My four year old son said, "Daddy, I want to drill into your tummy, crawl inside and eat your dinner." The food was ok, but I didn't think it was worth that much effort.
HP
#23 Note To Self: Hide Car
My 6 year old daughter in the passenger seat a few days ago looked at me and said, "Dad, when I'm seven, I'm going to kill you. No wait, when I'm eight". I had to ask, "So, how are you going to do that?" She smiled and said, "I'm gonna drive over your head with this car."
HP
#22 Outsmarted
I taught English in a school in Spain, and I wasn't supposed to let the kids know that I speak Spanish (so they are forced to communicate in English). A 10-year-old girl came up to me one day, grabbed me by the hand, and said, with the most horrifying straight face ever, "Te vas a la muerte," or "You're going to die." I was so shocked at the randomness of it, that my jaw must have dropped. She then laughed her head off and said, "HA! You do speak Spanish!" Afterward, she skipped away laughing and smiling.
Creepiest thing a kid has ever said to me, and probably the most clever thing a kid ever did while I was a teacher.
Deleted
losangeles.cbslocal.com
#21 When To Set Up The Video Camera
"When you turn off the lights, that's when the black circles come. They come down like this (holds his hands in the air above his bed), and they stay for a second. Then, zoop, they go inside!" (Slaps hands to his chest.)
Then, barely holding back tears, he says, "I hate it."
Utah Family Magazine
#20 Past Lives Revealed!
When my niece was around three or four years old, she told me she used to have a baby, but it drowned. The baby was named Peanut Butter, but still.
CBS Sacramento
#19 Always Make Time For Fishing
When I was little, my grandfather, whom I called Pop Pop, always promised to take me fishing. Things always came up or I wasn't in town to go with him when he went. He died when I was 7, and I never had a chance to go fishing. I had never gone fishing, and have not since he died.
Fast forward 20 years, my wife and I have a 3 year old daughter. I've never spoken to her about my Pop Pop, and I've never talked about him in front of her. I haven't brought him up to anyone since before my daughter was born. One day, I'm off with my daughter and she's in her room. Suddenly, she comes running into the living room where I'm sitting, and says the following:
Her: "Daddy, we have to go fishing!" (We don't live near a lake or anything, so this was kinda weird for her to say in the first place.)
Me: "Why do we have to go fishing?"
Her: "Because Pop Pop says you have to take me!"
Me: "Wait, what? Who told you?"
Her: "Pop pop says you need to take me to go fish."
I'm not really a believer in an afterlife or anything, but I darn sure took her fishing. She has not mentioned Pop Pop since then, and it's been almost a year.
gearweare
#18 Serial Killer: The Early Years
When my niece was 3, she covered up my head with a blanket and held it down. I moved my head out where I could see her. She said, "You can't come out," and smothered me again. I laughed and said, "Why?" She gritted her teeth and angrily said, "Because I don't want you to."
Trek BBS
#17 Ghostly Lullibies
I was with my sister, her husband, and their two year old daughter. We were talking about loved ones that had recently passed, (my father had died recently). My brother-in-law grabbed a picture of his mother, who had died in a car crash when he was six, to show me. When my niece saw the picture, she started laughing. We asked her what was so funny. She looked at us and said, "That's my special friend who sings to me." I still shiver a bit just thinking about it.
artstation.com
#16 Mother Nature's Creepy Sidekick
My niece drew a picture "of a man in her room," that she kept telling her parents about. He had two different colored eyes, and one was gray. When asked why it was gray, she responded, "Because he can see the storm coming."
sueguiney.com
#15 Hide All Weapons
My 8 year old son always says odd things. Usually, they're funny, but this one threw me for a loop. I was telling him how much I love him and thanking him for being in my life. He said, "I didn't choose this life. I couldn't control how it began, but I can control how it ends."
hellogiggles
#14 When Big Brother Comes Calling
My, then, 3 year old daughter, walked downstairs in the morning and said, "Look what I can do!," and she crossed her eyes. I asked her how she learned to do that, and she said, "The boy taught me at night."
Me: "What boy?"
Her: "The boy with the glasses. He did this." She held her finger up and zoomed it to her nose, crossing her eyes. She said he laughed and laughed.
Not too scary, right? Only, that's how my brother taught me to cross my eyes when I was 5 years old. He died when I was 7.
popsugar.com
#13 What NOT To Tell The Teacher
Not my child, but I, at 4 years old, once got my toe stuck under a door and lost skin due to it. When I went to kindergarten the day after, the teacher asked what happened. I told her my dad did it with a knife. My parents had to come to school that evening for a talk.
Oops.
Wikipedia
#12 Children's Predictions Can Save Lives
We were driving down a dark, snowy highway late one evening. The final stretch of a 16 hour long road trip. My son, who was around 4 or 5 at the time, was in the back seat and becoming a bit restless. Suddenly, he covered his face with a blanket and announced loudly, "I don't want to get glass on my face!" A few moments later, a pick-up truck, towing some snowmobiles, pulled out in front of a tractor trailer a few cars in front of us and got hit, spinning out into the median. Fortunately, we avoided the accident completely. It was indeed a bit creepy, though, almost as though he predicted there was going to be an accident right in front of us.
Video Blocks
#11 Useful Information Over Cartoons
My child had woken up early, so she was watching cartoons next to me in my bed while I tried to wake up.
I heard a funny sound downstairs earlier, that I mentally blamed on the dogs.
Then my kiddo leans over to me and remarks, "Oh, there's a man in the house."
AWAKE! AWAKE! AWAKE!
(Never found anything, and never got any further details from her.)
Beaker Muppet Quotes
#10 I Know Something You Don't Know
When my son was 3, he kept saying he had a baby sister with a pink bow, but she died. We never had a baby girl; however, we did have a miscarriage just before that episode.
Baby Wisp
#9 Just Because It Happened To Jesus ...
When I was about 3, we had a cat that had still-born kittens. I asked my father if we could make crosses for them, which he did. As he was making them I asked, "Aren't those too small?" Dad replied, "What do you mean?" I said, "Aren't we going to nail them to them?" Dad, (after several moments silence), "We're not going to do that." Me, "Oh."
madeheart.com
#8 The Truth Revealed About Monsters
My son (5 years old at the time) woke up scared from a dream in the middle of the night.
I asked him what it was about (which, in retrospect, was probably a mistake.) He said that he had a dream where people turned "bad," and you could tell because their teeth turned pointy.
Then, in the dream, he realized that his teeth were pointy.
He woke up as he was trying to figure out how to hide his pointy teeth from everyone.
I can dig it. The scariest thing is not that a monster is coming to get us, it's that we are the monster.
Video Blocks
#7 When I Grow Up, I Want To Be ...
My daughter and I were playing at the park when she told me she wants to burn bodies when she's older. Little creeped but okay. Turns out her grand dad told bee about the mortuary across the street and she saw the smoke billowing out. She still wants to cremate people.
Deleted
healthline.com
#6 Straight Honesty. We Love It
To our 3-year-old son: "What would you do if we had another baby?"
Our son: "I'd kill it."
handinhandparenting.org/
#5 Whatever You Do, Don't Wake Jonah
My 6-year-old nephew told my brother that everyone on Earth was a figment of "Jonah's" imagination and that when "Jonah" wakes up, we'll all disappear. When asked who Jonah is, he replied VERBATIM: "He's the one who sleeps. The dreamer in the dream." Made my skin crawl the first time he told me.
tinytidbits
#4 Future Writer Of Law and Order Episodes
My friend's 7 year old kid pretended to put me in jail. Our conversation went something like this:
Me: "What did I do? Forget to brush my teeth? Didn't do my homework?"
Her: "You murdered a 23 year old woman while she was jogging in the early morning."
Me: "...."
Today
#3 Time To Nail The Window Shut
I have a 3-year-old daughter. She tells me that a red man comes into her room at night through her window. His name is "Consequences" and he's mean to her. She said he hurts her and stares at her while she is in her bed. She says that he comes in a space ship with other red men. I have no idea where she would get the material for this story, and she really, really believes it. I've locked her window for her and pulled the blinds, all in an attempt to convince her that no one is getting in through her window. Sometimes, in the morning, she'll say "It didn't work, Momma, Consequences got in last night again." I hope it's a phase and it will pass...
AMC
#2 The First Taste Of Dark Power
My daughter, about 5 years old at the time, riding with me in my truck. A gnat, mosquito, bug of some kind is buzzing around her and bothering her, so she's complaining about it, so I told her to just swat it. She visually follows it until it's against the passenger window, and quickly smashes it with her hand. She then turns to me, with the strangest look in her eyes, and says "That was my first time killing something."
YTimage
#1 Making Use Of Every Last Bit
Playing tea party, little one keeps passing me "cake". I dutifully eat each piece she passes me.
"It was poison. You died." Oh, okay then.
She then proceeded to "chop me up," mix my chopped parts with some spice in a pot, and then serve the resulting stew to her mother.
Pinterest
gearweare
AMC
Pinterest
